Archive | October 2004

New Car

Ok yesterday I went to the dealership and finally bought my car.  2004 Tacoma 4×4 full stocked and red with a glass paint job, 7 year warranty and every 5000 mile maitenance.  Talked the sales guy down but I still ended up paying a lot for extra stuff.  Blah….great driving my own car but sucks thinking about payment.  Now im looking for another job! Woke up so early and was so sleep at work I wanted to die.haha  Luckily my friends were talking to me and made the day go by really fast.  Anyhow, it started raining the same day I got a car.  It must be a premonition!  Anyways, I need more money.


Playstation BITCH!

If I was Playstation, I can hit the reset button and  be a little sperm swimming in my daddy’s pole in search of the holy grail.  Or I could just go back to 5 years of age and start a life anew.

Church is Evil

Is it wrong to fear the church? I’m not christian or catholic, but when I enter a church with someone I get a sense of eyes gearing at me. When I’m alone I feel like something might come and destroy me. haha
I sense a force opposing me, but that was years ago. I got scared walking in and seeing all those glass windows reflecting holy figures. In symbolic trinkets, the characters expressed unexpressive anger. In my head, the sound of saints echoed melodramic melodies, suspending the motion of my body and triggered unsettling movements to my knees. If this was a movie, I’d look up towards the ceiling startled with my hands open trying to cover myself from the intending light to suck me up or transform me into scattered ashes. But it’s not a movie, so it disquiets my nerves without an end to the utmost. The anxiety ceases when I exit the church. I feel the same infront of the shrine my parents worship their gods. Everytime I make pass it, I hear sharp sounds trying to let go in my head. Sometimes I just stand and watch to see what happens and leave w/out looking back. Sometimes from on the top floor of my house I look down the carpet door steps to the living room I can see the shrine glowing in red(really is red) luminating a somber engulfed living room. Sometimes in my mind, I see morbid spirits standing there praying quietly with sorrow, so I try not to look at it too long or their attention would divert towards me for something very unsatisfying. Whether I believe in god or not, there’s something about them that freightens me. I maybe paranoid or I’m fated to become a super villain one of these days!! Who wants to be the super hero? haha

I think I have issues. haha